Saturday, February 25, 2012

Creating Differences

Nine weeks into this pregnancy with Cinco, and I have already lost track of things I am trying to do differently.  With the pregnancy being only two weeks behind in the timeline of Lucas and Caleb's, there is quite a bit of that to do.    Every birthday and holiday I am pregnant from January until June, I was pregnant with them. And since I am big on traditions, it is really like deja-vu.  I sat in the very same classroom for Colton's Valentine's party, pregnant with the twins, two years ago as I did this year for Ethan's, and pregnant with Cinco.  It was something I couldn't avoid.  It was hard, though.

In my mind, if I can do little things differenty, this pregnancy will end differently.  Some of these things may sound silly to some people, but in my mind, they just might make a difference.  Another mom and I talked about how when we've lost our babies, we told our husbands while they were still in bed.  So this time, we both made sure they were up and about.  And we are now 9 weeks and 14 weeks pregnant.  See, something you would never think about, unless you've been here.

I keep looking back at my pregnancy with Lucas and Caleb to check dates of appointments, trips we took, and milestones we hit.  For some reason, it seems like everything is trying to coincide with each other, and it drives me a little crazy.  W's birthday is coming up next month.  We usually go to Lambert's to celebrate.  And I really don't want to this year.  We were home for Easter when I was pregnant with the twins, I am planning on being far away, and I will not be swimming on Memorial Day weekend this year.  You won't find me anywhere near a pool.  And I am pretty sure my ob appt's will fall in the same calendar week starting in April.  I hope with all hope my dr will let me go in a week early to throw that off some.

by Carrie

What things are you doing differently this pregnancy as compared to your pregnancy that ended in loss?  Are your timelines similar also.  If so, how has that affected you?


Dana said...

I am doing a lot of things differently. I also checked my doctor's appointments and made sure that they weren't on the same dates as appointments I had with Jacob. Some are just off by a day or two, but it's enough. I don't get baby development emails sent to me every week, as I did with Jacob and Cub and I haven't signed up on any baby sites about how far along I am with Boh. I just go and look manually when a new week arrives. I don't keep track of my pregnancy with Boh the same way I did with any of the others. For Boh, I buy notebooks and write about things in them I won't eat Mini Wheats cereal because I ate it a lot with Jacob and I won't go to East Side Mario's because that is where we were when I started bleeding when pregnant with Jacob and where we went after it was confirmed that Cub was a blighted ovum. And of course, as you mentioned, I didn't tell Ted that I was pregnant until he got out of bed because I needed it to be different than how I told him about our lost babies. I don't know if I'll go to church on Mother's Day this year because I went when I was pregnant with Jacob and got a carnation, like the other Mom's did. The list goes on and its tiring, but it also gives me a sense of security, even though I really have no control over the end result of this pregnancy since I never did anything wrong in any of the others either.

Sheri said...

I'm doing a few things different, some irrational and some probably not. The irrational - I listened to a few eminem songs after Noah and while Gabriel was still alive... I've decided he's too angry (although this is not a revelation) and change the station/song if needed. Only happy music this time 'round. When I was pregnant with the boys, I ate super healthy, no candy/sugar - with this baby...well, I think we'll probably have to monitor her sugar intake for the rest of her life. I think I've singlehandedly kept peppermint stick ice cream on the shelf, and I really should have stock in Hershey's. I have chocolate bars stashed everywhere!